Women on Harleys

I'm not going to lie, I've been reluctant to write this post as (contrary to what some may think), my goal is not to anger as many people as possible (especially other Christians). But three reasons compel me to forge ahead.

First: The Bible supports it
Second: I have lived it
Third: A movie we own emboldened me

The third reason requires some elaboration. It's "A Man Called Peter". Set in WWII America, it is the life story of preacher Peter Marshall. This is not going to be a movie review (my daughter does wonderful reviews on her blog), but anyone who loves Jesus should enjoy the movie. Anyway, there is a scene where a college age Catherine (Marshall's future wife), makes a speech at a youth rally. The crux of her talk is that women have lost much more than they have gained attaining "equality" with men. I don't know if the speech is authentic, but the content is tremendous in it's Biblical view of womanhood.

So, here we go. In a perfect world (i.e. Biblical), women would be content at home supporting their husband, raising a family; generally creating a loving environment. The home should be a Godly Haven (especially in these times), where a man can escape the strife of modern society. Creating this environment is certainly a full-time job. As the Bible tells us: the woman who can manage this is more precious than jewels. My wife has done this the near 20 years we have been married. Believe me when I say she is more precious than jewels (or newer cars, more toys, fancy vacations).

Of course there are exceptions due to life's circumstances; not just lifestyle choices. I believe these would fall into four main categories:

a husband can't work
a husband won't work
a woman is single
children have moved out on their own and husband agrees

In any of these scenarios a woman could enter the workforce to whatever degree it didn't adversely affect her primary responsibility as a homemaker (by the way, homemaker should carry more esteem than CEO. Women who are good at their job are far more common than women who are homemakers; let alone good ones!). There are shades of grey within these categories, but I don't have time to discuss them here. Suffice to say I understand some women must work.

Stating that, let me get back to why that should be the exception; not the rule.

 The Bible clearly portrays this arrangement. Women are described as "weaker vessels". This is weaker as in delicate; as a fine porcelain object is more delicate than a common wooden object. This weaker vessel is to be protected and highly valued - not thrown out into our contemptuous world to battle it out with men providing for their families.

What women have mostly become emancipated from in this post-modern society is the pedestal they were on. Why should men "gaze up" to the woman on the pedestal? She's no longer there. She's next to him at work, at the bar, at the gym. Heck, she's sitting right next to him at the traffic light on her Harley (sporting her own tattoos, no doubt). All too often these days she's not the "fairer sex" offering God's counterbalance to men who generally trend toward the brutish. She's right there encouraging and participating in this behavior; whether it's laughing at smutty jokes or enjoying cage fighting. Women have come down to our level; that's not good. I've heard statistics indicating that women are not only earning degrees at rates surpassing men, but also suffering from heart disease and strokes. It sure seems like the trade-off is not worth it.

So why? Because over the last 50-60 years women have been sold a bill of goods; being a wife and mother isn't enough. Of course the unsaved weren't hard to convince, but even believers have bought into it. I know couples (speaking of self-described believers), who  both work (often both high-paying jobs), for no other reason than to enjoy a higher standard of living. They could comfortably live on the husbands income if they would fore go some "luxuries" such as brand new cars, newer, bigger houses, expensive and/or frequent vacations, expensive clothes, toys, etc. Granted, luxury is a subjective based on income, but if you can't afford it on the man's income after paying bills and tithing; it could be a luxury.

The template we followed as a married couple was established in the early 1900's as people moved from farms and men started working away from home. Women stayed home and created that soothing environment that a husband could look forward to after "slogging it out" in the world of commerce and manufacturing.

As my parents, we started off in a small, older house, in a not-so-ritzy part of town. We drove used cars, didn't take many vacations, and had to adhere to a budget (especially after our first child). We were (and are), happy and wanted for nothing. A lot of people were surprised we were able to pull this off (and I bet they would have been shocked if they knew how little my income actually was).

Over the years, God has blessed us immeasurably, but the two constants have been the ability to provide for our family and a loving wife/mother who understands there is no higher calling for a a woman than to maintain a Godly home for her family. She could have chosen the common path, as she has a Bachelor's and could have made good money in the education field. Thankfully, God planted in us the desire for the eternal and imperishable rather than the temporal and perishable (i.e. stuff).

I am not saying Christians can't enjoy material pleasures or have to live in the seedy part of town and drive rust-buckets. I am saying that a husband and wife should fulfill their God-ordained roles first, then feel free to enjoy whatever material blessings the Lord allows them.

In addition, when a wife becomes a mother, the imperative nature of all of this is heightened. As children are gifts from God, raising them Biblically is a 24/7 responsibility for the parents - especially the mother. No component of this should be left to strangers (i.e. daycare). We have two teens that my wife has home-schooled, so not only have we controlled curriculum, we have been able to control environment and reinforce values until that inevitable time when they function more in the "world", but hopefully don't become more "of the world".

My desire is that this is an encouragement for those sharing our experience, or those who may be considering the option.


God made us man and woman to compliment each other, not compete against each other.

Hater? I Think Not

Based on views, I feel I should apologize for not posting sooner; based on comments I'm not sure it really matters. Being a husband, father (of teens), still working, along with taking care of the normal "stuff" and trying to keep myself in shape with recreation; it gets tough to carve out the time for a post. I like to think that my thoughts are shared by others, but with no comments, it's hard to tell - and a bit discouraging. A few brief comments would go a long way toward encouragement. Anyway, enough of the whining; on to the subject at hand.

I have been accused of being a "hater" when I express disapproval of those who conduct themselves contrary to God's Will. First off - I hate the word hater. We didn't need a new word. We already had critic, judge, cynic, complainer, etc. But even if I accepted the word used by others; it's not accurate. Definitions of hater indicate that the one "hating" has no real basis or reason for their "hate". Well, if I am using God's standard, how could there be a more solid basis? When the Bible uses the word hate it indicates God's direct disapproval or how a believer should react to anything in this category. Essentially, a believer should hate what God hates. So, that's where I'm coming from when I post about the general state of our society.

So yes, I hate it when the fruit of the spirit enumerated in Galatians 5:23 is scarce, but reprobate behavior is everywhere (most disturbingly in the churches). I don't expect to eliminate  it as we are told in these times there will be mockers and those who only want to hear what they want to (certainly not what God says), but we can certainly refrain from participating. 

I used to participate in the same revelries as most of society, but when I became saved the Holy Spirit convicted me that changes were needed. Inappropriate movies were disposed of (not just put away: trashed (gratuitous violence/sex/language is inappropriate for any follower of Christ - young or old), alcohol was removed from our house (a drink may be alright; a drunk is never alright), music promoting/lauding bad behavior was avoided, and similar type
conversation (especially gossip), was ignored. This is no small feat in this age. Even among professing believers, we have been considered a bit extreme. However debatable that may be, I would much rather err on the cautious side. Even as believers, we can never actually attain or maintain God's standards (try the Ten Commandments on for size), but by setting our sights on them we should come a lot closer than most do. So many live out the philosophy of seeing how close they can get to fire (sin), and not get burned. The prudent course is stay as far away as you can from the fire, then there is no doubt as to whether you're scorched or not. As 1 Thessalonians exhorts: don't even give the impression that you're involved in evil.

When self-proclaimed Christians "hang out" with unbelievers, they have to be extra careful to be set-apart; to be salt and light, not just go along to get along. Some situations are just going to be off-limits. Yeah, you can (I have), go with unbelieving friends to a place that serves alcohol (I personally gave up alcohol 5 years ago; I want to always be able to give Jesus my best, and I don't want to be a stumbling block), but you better be real sure how to conduct yourself. There is no way to justify (knowingly),  going to an inappropriate movie, or anyplace that allows or promotes that kind of behavior. You won't often find the fruit of the Spirit in environments such as these. If you find yourself in one; you better exhibit the fruit.

As true believers, we don't hate anyone in the sense that the world means it. We truly hate the sin, not the sinner; whereas those of the world truly hate the sinner and usually couldn't give a fig about the sin. They hate those of different skin color, religion, economic/social status, music taste, clothing taste, etc. And since the whole unrepentant lot of them are sinners, it never enters the equation. Christians on the other hand, hate the sin that keeps the person wallowing in it from Christ. We want the best possible for everyone: a relationship with Jesus Christ. 

I hate that there is way too much of the wrong hate in the world, and not nearly enough of the right hate. And that's because I love what Jesus Christ did on the Cross for me (and you).